On Being Famous

Taking a break from cleaning my room - it's times like these that make me want to just toss all my belongings - I started randomly just looking up stuff on the Internet.

I found a Japanese TV show where contestants had to match other contestants with their celebrity doppelgangers.

I found an article that proclaimed that Rupert Grint (who plays Ron Weasley in HP) (Off topic: Did you know that there's a Harry Potter wiki?) fancies Queen Elizabeth.

I started to wonder: I wonder how much it would freak me out if I found videos of me posted on Youtube.  I wonder what it would be like to actually have a Wikipedia article about me.  Or to be a trending topic on twitter. 

(Just to be safe, I did check.  I share the same name as an actress, a figure skater and a rocket scientist at NASA so all the stuff posted had to do with them.  Phew!  ...)

Honestly, though, what would that be like?

This week I've struggled a little with reputation.

On one hand I think there might be some strange reputation about my apartment wandering around.  For the life of us, we can't find a third roommate to take our open spot - even though there are people moving in and in need of housing.  I know it's silly but part of me is paranoid that people have been whispering, "That apartment - those girls...You just stay away from them."  You see, I can't actually fill in what reputation they think we have because I have no idea. 

On the other hand, I sometimes wonder if people think more highly of me than they should.  Randomly, sometimes, in life, I find people saying things to me or about me that lead me to believe that they think that I am perfect at pretty much everything I attempt to put my hand to.  It's very nice of them but I find I start to give myself pressure and pretty soon I'm floundering under my supposed expectations of others on top of already high expectations I've established for myself.  I start to cringe away from any compliments and pretty soon any time someone is kind to me, I get the feeling that I want to run for the hills and never return.  WHAT IF THEY FIND OUT I'M NOT <gasp> PERFECT?!   

Now what does this have to do with being famous?

Let me just say, that after much thought on the subject, I am so glad that in the world view of things, I am a nobody. 

I'm nobody! Who are you?
Are you nobody, too?
Then there's a pair of us — don't tell!
They'd banish us, you know.

How dreary to be somebody!
How public, like a frog
To tell your name the livelong day
To an admiring bog!

~ Emily Dickinson