I woke up this morning with one thought: I was here once before, six months ago, facing relegation. But this time, it's real. It's not some self-appointed goal I would like to meet to save face. If I don't pass my proposal defense, then...
Six months ago, I was a sad little soul, working her heart out in her lab with nothing to show for her efforts. Except this: that people loved her, that she would never give up, and that, in the end, things have a way of working themselves out. (If it hasn't worked out, it's not the end)
I've been struggling for the past 6 months since then to keep myself going despite my exhaustion. Yet, so many people have done so much to keep me going.
A very small example of this: I need a computer for my proposal tomorrow to Skype in a professor for the defense. My own computer will be used for the presentation and it's doesn't have any Skype capability anyway. I sent out a random request to the people in my ward. Within 5 minutes, I had multiple people write me back, offering their services. In fact, even hours after the fact, I still have people texting and emailing to make sure I am set. People that I love, people that I know well, people that I don't know well, people that I wished I knew better. How does a girl get so lucky?
Despite my worries about "relegation" I have to keep these things in my mind.
I'm not alone in this battle. I never was.
12 hours. 12 hours.
I can do this.