Here are some tidbits from conversations I have participated in this week:
While at dinner:
Friend: I am the Korihor of dating!
Friend 2: You are trying to win people over on to your side.
Friend 3: "And when they were married, that was the end thereof."
About a friend's impeccable sense of style.
Friend: DG, you either dress like a prep or a thug. Why is that?
DG: Like a thug?
Me: You wore a knit cap the other day.
DG: It was cold outside!
Me: We were inside. And it was perfectly situated on your head. I am never sure if you know how perfectly you dress or not. Is it planned or...?
DG: Me trying too hard?
Me: Well, I wasn't going to say it but...
DG: Yep, I'm definitely trying too hard.
Me: So, there's gas leaking right outside our window.
Colleague: Is this a problem?
Me: I was just wanting to let you guys know in case you didn't know about it already. I wondered if it was related to the leak you had earlier this week.
Lab Manager: No, that was coolant leaking. You say, this is gas leaking?
Me: Yep. I noticed it on Monday but we just opened our windows and I realized that it's still going so I thought I should let you know.
Lab Manager: The compressor room exhausts gas into the atmosphere after an experiment. It is probably just the noise of that echoing off the building.
Me: Hmm...except that this week is the first time I've heard it and you've run the experiment many times before.
Lab Manager: I was hoping you wouldn't notice that flawed logic. I'll go check it out.
Linds: You have a big box outside your door.
Me: Yep, I ordered something. It's probably just that.
<I lug it inside>
Me: It's paper. Wait, this is all paper?
Linds: Looks like it.
Me: I didn't realize I ordered so much. 5000 sheets?
Linds: Didn't you notice it when you bought it?
Me: Well, no, I assumed it was just a ream.
Linds: Isn't there a significant price difference between one ream and all of that?
Me: Isn't paper expensive?
Linds: How expensive are you talking?
<we look up my order>
Me: Oops. I really did just order an order of magnitude more paper than I wanted. Oh no! My poor mailman! He lugged this thing all the way down here just for me to return it!
[We returned the paper in-store and Linds told the manager the whole story so that he could laugh at my blunder too. It made his night.]
Here's something awesome: Gershwin playing Gershwin. It's a different version than how he recorded it later but it's really jazzy and downright inspiring. (nod to Austin for sharing it with me)