Silly Love Songs

(I) I love people
(II) I love music
(III) I love Chinese
(IV) I love writing.

The situation:
Recently, my friend and I decided that we want to perform in an upcoming acoustic night performance together.  So, I started hunting through my music and found what I decided was the perfect song: Hey! by Evan Yo.  Since my friend does not speak Chinese, it would only require a little translation and rewriting to make rhyming lyrics for the chorus.

It seems like the perfect combination right?  Me + friend (I) + Chinese song (II,III) + Rewritten English lyrics (II,IV)  If I were to give each Roman numeral 100 utils of happiness, you'd think this would just break the bank.

Except not.

It seems that I have a penchant for writing horribly cheesy rhymes doing neither the song, or the Chinese or my writing abilities justice.  Don't believe me?

Original Lyrics:

**Hey！
請把你的手交給我
請你不要害羞
跟我一起點點頭
這屬於我們的節奏


Rough Translation:
**Hey!
Please give me your hand.
Please don't be shy.
Nod your head with me.
This is our rhythm.

What I came up with?
Hey!
The melody of you and I
Two heart that beat as one.
Take my hand, boy, don't be shy.
...

And then I was at a loss.  I thought it was brilliant, at least until I sang it out loud and then I groaned and threw it all out.  If I'm this bad when I'm not in love with anyone, I shudder to think what mush awaits me when I am.