Wednesday, March 7, 2012

Love, and Love Again

Today, I officially fell out of love with my lab.

You, the reader, ask: What? You were in love with your lab?

Me: I'm not sure. It had its moments. I liked getting things right. I liked knowing my lab forwards and backwards. I liked knowing its quirks and its personality. Last week, I even considered becoming a lab manager of a lab much like my own.

You see, the thing that makes me not like my lab is that I need data and FAST. And my lab is quite effective at thwarting those efforts at every turn. Over the past few months, I have wavered between nervous and desperate. Today, I reached a breaking point.

I even texted this to my labmate: "Do you think I could transfer to someplace else to get a PhD?"

He saw that and panicked.  I reread what I wrote, looked for the possibility of PhD programs in another country and then came to my senses.  

It takes time to fall in love with something.  It takes patience.  It takes kindness.  It takes heart.  

I think my lab and I are both in need of all of those. 

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